I always fucking understand. And I’m really getting mega tired of your shit.
*complains about being tired* * doesn’t sleep until 3am*
*thinks about the future for three seconds* *has a mental breakdown that lasts three weeks*
(Source: , via fake-mermaid)
Let’s play “How drunk I can get at a family party without them knowing”
the inside of your butt is warm enough to hardboil an egg
oh no I’m not falling for this one again
*leans in for a kiss accidentally burps and throws up in ur mouth* luv u babe